Halifax, Nova Scotia

I was in Halifax, Nova Scotia for an academic conference. Its my first time in the Maritimes, and really the first time outside of Ontario (except for Montreal, Quebec, but thats so close to Ontario it almost doesn't count). For the most part I did travel alone, and although I had some reservations about this I actually really enjoyed it! I travelled at my own pace and did the things I wanted to do without obligation to stick to someone's schedule.

I was staying at an Airbnb by the downtown Halifax harbourfront and its beautiful here. The owner is an architect and has fantastic taste in home decor as I've slowly been taking my own little notes here and there for ideas on my own place.

My host gave me a quick tour of Halifax after picking me up from the airport, we drove through Darmouth, which he dubbed "the Dark Side" and he said its much like the "Scarborough" of Toronto. This area is not as affluent as downtown Halifax and tends to be considered a bit more sketchy by the locals. We crossed the McDonald toll bridge (lo and behold, a toll bridge).

Here are my photos from the trip:

Halifax Seaport Farmer's Market

Happiness is in the Pursuit of Happiness

“The greatest thing in this world is not so much where we stand
as in what direction we are moving.” ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I always thought happiness was a destination, that once reached life would be immediately better. That perhaps after reaching a goal ______[weight, making a certain amount of money, finishing school, buying that new tech piece, clothing item, vacation] that would be it, I would have finally achieved happiness, life would be perfect and smooth sailing. How I ever came to that conclusion, I don't know. No one has ever explicitly explained it to me.

In the past, during those pursuits of said goals ______ [weight, getting a job, finishing school, buying that  new tech piece, clothing item, vacation] I focused SOLELY on just reaching that destination at whatever mental, physical, spiritual cost that came along. Once I achieved that goal, guess what? I felt EXACTLY the same as I did as before.  The only thing I really felt was surprised, unfulfilled, and all I could think of to myself was "is that it? thats what I worked for? And I don't feel any different.. any happier?"

What happiness is not: 

• It isn't about the acquisition of material possessions or monetary wealth (as media and businesses would have you believe).
  
  One pervasive example of the effect of money on happiness - lottery winners have an elevated level of happiness that lasts about two weeks before that level goes back to what it was before they ever won the money. Although that amount of money makes life considerably easier in terms of living expenses, they are still the same people, with the issues and self-limiting beliefs.

Breakdancing

"You can learn new things at any time in your life if you're willing to be a beginner. 
If you actually learn to like being a beginner, the whole world opens up to you." -Barbara Sher

I've been dancing salsa pretty regularly for the past year (actually, just over a year) and I've built some confidence in my skills and abilities. I can follow pretty well and dance in a social setting.

The idea of feeling bad at something is very uncomfortable for me. I like the idea of being competent and decently skilled at any particular activity. So as someone that has finished school, and have been doing a very familiar set of hobbies/activities for a long time, I haven't had that feeling of "being a beginner" for a while.

Anytime you learn a new skill - riding a bike, playing a new sport, playing a new instrument - its inevitable, you're going to suck at it - like be really really embarrassingly bad. "Sucking", at least initially, is a necessary step to eventual mastery of a skill. Embracing this attitude humbles us, and forces us to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. And that if we continue working persistently at it with deliberate practice, we can get a level where we don't suck as much - we might even become good, or great at what we do.

For me the activity I "suck at" is urban dance. I've attempted hip hop before, bad at it.  I decided to take up breakdancing after trying out one class and really enjoying the class, teacher, and moves we were learning (top rock, down rock and freezes - beginner class doesn't cover power moves like windmills).

If someone shows me a set of choreography, I'm relatively okay at replicating it. For the first few classes we did a "monkey see monkey do" routine. The instructor showed us some moves and we copied it. Very straight forward, very non-threatening and comfortable.

What REALLY pushed me outside of my comfort zone was when we tried applying what we learned in freestyle. Our instructor introduced us to breakdancing "cyphers" aka a dance circle. We play the bboy music and take turns trying out different moves we learned together. All of us are beginners (albeit 1 or 2 I'm PRETTY sure had bboyed before) but we encouraged each other, cheering or saying "good job good job" if one of us messed up.  When it was my turn, I went into the circle and did my thing, and I was HORRIBLE at it. I felt eembarrassed self-conscious... all really unfamiliar, uncomfortable feelings.  However in spite of this, I was absolutely delighted and excited - for the first time (in a long time) I felt challenged. I went home thinking about how much practice I needed before I would enter the dance circle again.

Bang Bang Ice Cream and Bakery

Today we had a high of 25 degrees in Toronto (really rare at the end of September) and we decided to go for ice cream in the Trinity Bellwoods area.  The owner of the Bakerbots Bakery opened up this store just a few months ago and its quickly becoming very popular. 

Their delicious ice cream sandwiches were HUGE. So we each ordered half ice cream sandwich. Eating these were challenging, as each bite caused ice cream to squish out the other side.

The lineup was the door, and we got inside eventually after about 25 minutes. It was well worth the wait.

Waiting in line for icecream :)

Jack of all trades, master of none

It takes me an hour to commute to work from home on the train; and during that time I bring my laptop with me and work on a couple of things: whether its working on extra-curriculars, listening to podcasts or music, or taking a course.

I've started with this simple 10 day online course that is to help jump start habits. The three habits I chose to work on were:

1. Cooking healthy homemade meals daily. 
2. Keeping my home organized.
3. Exercising daily. 

I know I could have chosen more worthy goals to try (e.g. "become a better person" or "volunteer more time to charitable causes"), but to be honest, these really simple everyday tasks are habits I really do struggle to find time to do consistently. I felt like if I can focus on getting these down, I could focus on bigger and better things. 

I realized the three goals I outlined were actually a bigger problem of managing my time.  I often feel I'm flying by the seat of my pants and getting to cooking healthy, keeping my place clean and exercising daily become impossible as well as juggling all the activities and side projects I take on. It's too much, and after some reflection following a burnout earlier this year, I decided that enough was enough.

A couple of mindsets holding me back:

"Being a 'yes' person": I said "yes" to a lot of things because I was afraid of missing out. Missing out on social opportunities, missing out on new experiences. Another thing is also the guilt associated with saying "no" to people. I know I certainly get peer pressured into a lot of things: taking up an activity, staying out late, changing my schedule to accommodate others. And yeah, it sucks to say 'no' to people, I hate the idea of disappointing people that are close or important to me. However, doing this more often is perhaps one of the best things I've done. And the people I've said "no" to on occasion; they've stuck around :)

Jack of all trades, master of none - High performers generally choose one or two things to focus on, and do so with deep focus. If I ever wanted to get good at anything, I can't do that while juggling 4 or 5 other activities.

Ombre Hair: Before, After and Aftercare

I've been wanting to get ombre done for such a long time, I even created a dedicated Pinterest board to styles of Ombre that looked good on darker hair. A lot of my Ombre hair inspiration comes from Lauren Conrad and Michelle Phan. I got referred to Hannah Hwang who works out of Goa beauty salon in Koreatown, Toronto, ON right by Christie station.

4 teeth lighter, and a little bit wiser

My wisdom teeth have been causing me pain every couple of weeks since the year started, to the point where I actually had difficulty speaking and loss of appetite. Although only one side was bothering me, I decided to have all four remove to prevent future cases of impacted wisdom teeth.

(via weheartit)

The surgery itself was not bad at all, the recovery however was a bit cumbersome.

Dinner at Madhur's (part two)

Photos edited in Adobe Lightroom. Pictures taken with Canon EOS SL1. 

Building up Resilience

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"It is not possible to change anything until you understand the substance you wish to change.” 

― Jeanette Winterson

My last few meet-ups with good friends has been enlightening on a few fronts. I love having deep conversations and there were a lot of interesting topics that came up. Specifically, a friend had taken up training for a marathon in the past year. He mentioned that although physical conditioning required persistent practice, it was the mental limitations that he found difficult to overcome (which usually occurred after 15 km).

Indian Food at Madhur's

I went to a friend's house that I met through salsa for a home made Indian dinner.

Lonely Hearts Valentine's Potluck

I've been feeling really sick this past week, and finally took a day off to recover (I slept the entire day, fluids, meds, etc.). As a result I had to postpone a potluck I had planned for VDay but nonetheless it went off without a hitch!

We don't take Valentine's Day too seriously, and take the "hallmark" holiday as an excuse to get together with good friends and have some good food.

I hosted an "anti-Valentine's" day potluck at my condo. I put together the facebook event and titled it "Lonely Hearts" (a homage to Marina and the Diamonds song, "Lonely Hearts Club"), the tagline was "for singles, couples and the confused".

Birthday Weekend!

The weekend of December 27th was my "birthday weekend". Each day I planned activities with close friends and family.

Shopping: Boxing Day Haul

Call it Spring

Call it Spring's Boshard Tote that was 30% off. This was the last model and luckily I was able to get it! I couldn't find it on the Call it Spring website and apparently these totes have been flying off the shelves.

Lessons Learned from Boxing Day

For the first time, ever I woke up early to go for Boxing Day shopping. I had done Black Friday this past November and was amazed at the number of deals. Most stores went all out! I was disappointed with the sales that were available for Boxing Day. I was not in the market for electronics so I was interested in clothing sales and kitchenware.

Instagram #1 : December Part 1

My Christmas break has been filled with family and friend meetups, gift exchanges, hot chocolate, sushi and.

Dec 1 / My dark, snowy commute

  

Jillian Michaels Body Revolution #2: Keeping up in Winter

I am currently half way through Jillian Michaels Body Revolution the second time around. I began in May 2013 and have had good results with weight loss and toning. Everything was put on pause when I moved to my new place in August. I have also been joining a lot of new activities including salsa classes, a small stint with hip hop which meant keeping up with a regular workout schedule was less realistic.

{via weheartit}

Halloween 2013: Three Blind Mice

I put together a Halloween Party inviting high school friends, friends from university and friends from salsa class. One of my goals for 2013 were to meet new people. We had decided to dress up and go to a Pub Crawl, my first in downtown Toronto.